The Paintball Player’s Psalm

The paintball is my master, I shall not want golf or hockey or any other sport.
He makes me to lie down in painted bunkers.

He leads me beside piles of old tires.
He fills my hopper.
He leads me on paths of spilled paint, for his name’s sake.
Yea, though as I walk to the crony station,
I will fear no ‘Angel’.
My marker and my mask, they comfort me.
He prepares a newbie before me in the midst of my enemies.
He anoints my jersey with paint; my pod pack runs over.
Safety, fun and competitiveness shall follow me all the days of my life,
And I shall play in fields of paintball forever.

Amen

(Written without any thought of malice or disrespect for those of religious persuasions.)